Yikes



murder: dude are you gonna apply to be our intern
james: for what?
murder: for ACN dude
james: what's wrong with you two?
murder: come on, crank out a resume, send it over. this is an opportunity sky's the limit for a smart kid like you
james: i'll mull it over, i also have an offer shoveling pigeon shit at washington square park which i think may be more lucrative.
murder: no no no. we will pay you MIGHTILY: cupcakes, balloons, vodka tonics
james: [redacted] said he'd throw in an occasional tug job
murder: goddamn right
james: sweet
murder: tug boats. tug jobblers. tug town tug jumblers.
james: yikes

::: highlights from the Awesome Celebrity Nooz era:

1.
"LOL! Kate Moss I can see your boogers! Ha ha ha! Haven’t you ever heard of your pinky finger?"

2.
"Whoah, awesome Mrs. Spears, or should I call you MOM, or should I call you Mrs. Spears, or should I call you Oops I did it again? I wonder if it hurt. They say she got a caesarian section. What is that? Like a salad or something?"

1 comment:

murder said...

Dear Redacted,

What Gives?

Yours,
Contracted